WAKE UP! Week Three college football viewing guide, schedule, and why-to-watch

With most of the paycheck slaughters and high profile intersectional matchups being concluded, we now enter conference play in earnest for a lot of the country. And, while the attention may be on the big names (USC-Texas, OSU-TCU), those oddly may not be the best remaining out-of-conference matchups. There are quite a few interesting games on tap today between the haves and the have-nots — with better-than-you’d-expect chances for the G5 to beat brand-name power conference teams.

Below is your schedule and viewing/streaming information for the day (all times Eastern.)

Here’s what to watch for in early action:

Strictly for the Bettors:

There’s absolutely no need to watch these ghastly blowouts:

Kent State at Penn State

Directional Georgia at Clemson

SMU at Michigan

ULL at Mississippi State

San Jose State at Oregon

Middle Tennessee at Georgia

This Morning, Watch This

No. 21 Miami (-11.5) at Toledo (12:00)

Miami has gotten blasted by a decent-but-not-great LSU team and then paid for the privilege of destroying Savannah State. What we do know about the ‘Canes isn’t much...but neither is it positive. Malik Rosier will still be leading The U as they travel into the Glass Bowl to face a very good Rockets team, and they may need all of those points. Miami’s defensive athleticism should carry the day, but the Hurricanes could drop this one if they need to keep up in a high-scoring game. Only Mark Richt has faith in this offense at the moment.

Oklahoma (-18.5) at Iowa State (12:00)

The sleepy noon game in Ames is always good for an upset or three throughout the season. Don’t expect the Sooners to sleepwalk though, after being thoroughly roughed up last year by the Cyclones in Norman — the ‘Clones timely passing, underneath zones, and ground game gave the Bulldogs a blueprint it would follow in a CFP Rose Bowl semifinal. This is Murray’s first road game, and the Sooners have some injury issues already. It will be interesting to see if this team is as good as advertised: UCLA suggested not. Or if the Cyclones have taken a step back from last year’s surprisingly salty bunch — early results suggest not, as well. If OU has the foot on the gas though, we all may be reaching for the remote sooner rather than later.

Hawaii at Army (-6.5) 12:00

The trip to Oahu may be the hardest one to make in all of college football. Conversely, flying 4970 miles to West Point to face a game Army squad with an efficient passing attack is probably as difficult. This one kicks off at 6:00 a.m. Manoa time — and having made that HST to EDT flight a few times, I can tell you it takes days to overcome the sluggishness. The surprisingly undefeated Warriors could easily get back on the plane with an L in the ledger. If not, this one actually has potential to be one of the day’s under-the-radar good games.

2018 is a helluva’ drug.

Troy at Nebraska (lines are all over the place: -11 to -13) 12:00

On August 1st, the Huskers had four quarterbacks. After an injury to Adrian Martinez in last week’s loss to Colorado, Nebraska has one — a walk-on. The Trojans ran into the Boise buzzsaw two weeks ago, but don’t sleep on them in this game. The offense is fast and balanced, and Nubber has been gashed on the ground. Worse, they were terrible with ball security last week. If UNL goes -3 again, the Trojans could walk out of Lincoln with another program-defining win under their belt, one that finally puts Neal Brown on the national map.

Florida State at Syracuse (-3) 12:00

The Seminoles look lost. They’ve been blasted on the ground, smoked through the air, the passing offense is a mess, and the running game hasn’t gotten on track. The results against Samford last week weren’t an abberation: FSU’s secondary really is that bad. See what I wrote above re: sleepy noon games in Ames? Raucous noon games inside the deafening Carrier Dome have that effect on teams too: This one could get really, really weird. The Orangemen offense is going to give FSU fits. The only question is if the defense can get enough stops — or if they can sit back and watch the Seminoles shoot themselves in the foot again. If I had to watch one game this morning, it’s probably this one.

Vandy at Notre Dame...(do you even care about the rest of this?)

I mean, I guess? It’s an SEC team? They both have small student bodies and high SATs? But, on the Nerd Bowl entertainment scale, this one is still well below the annual Duke-Northwestern game.

Unwatchable Filth of the Morning

It’s rare we have a two-way tie for the distinction of #butt, yet here we are, and an even representation of Power 5 teams too: SEC, Big 12, Big 10.

Rutgers (+2) at Kansas 12:00

Two weeks ago, the Jayhawks were manhandled by FCS Nicholls State. Last week Kansas got its first road win in nine years when it visited MAC stinker Central Michigan. Kansas is now looking for its first two-game winning streak in seven years. It’s not just their raw suckage stats either: KU’s metrics are terrible. They are literally dead last in F+ among the P5 teams — 103rd overall. The only major conference opponent that comes close to being KU-bad is the visiting team: The Rutgers Scarlet Knights, clocking in at 102nd. Both of these teams struggle to score, are undersized, slog around on offense and defense, and play undisciplined, unprepared, talentless football. Worse, it’s boring. This will be the worst game between two P5 opponents all season.

That alone kind of makes me want to watch it.

UTEP (+32.5) at Tennessee 12:00

The matchup vying for the ass crown sees the worst team in FCS football, the UTEP Miners, travel 2000 miles for a JP game against the awful Tennessee Volunteers. The Vols have some talent; that was apparent in their season-opening loss. But, they don’t have nearly enough of it to overlook anyone. Throw in an offense that doesn’t know what it wants to be, a defense trying to learn the 3-4 (and all of the mistakes that entails), and a coaching staff on training wheels with one flat tire, and you have the makings of a dreadful viewing experience. This will be another morbid curiosity/horrorshow you kind of half-heartedly want to tune in to.

I’m half-tempted to lay a bill on UTEP to cover. I don’t know that Tennessee can beat anyone by 32 points. If it were Arkansas, I would.

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We’ll be back at 3:30 Eastern with your afternoon viewing guide, why-to-watch and open thread. For now, please enjoy this one and feel free to chime in on all topics of interest...or even ones of disinterest; we can always ignore you.