Bill Simmons was marketed as some kind of rebellious bad boy. He was sold to us as a strong-minded sports and pop culture connoisseur, a fountain of opinions and a media savant with an HBO show where he would pull no punches.
This was the guy, after all, in that overplayed commercial talking about how billionaire sports owners should build their own bleeping stadiums. Tough guy.
But what he really is, what Simmons truly has developed into over the last six weeks since “Any Given Wednesday with Bill Simmons” made its much publicized debut on HBO is the host of one of the worst sports shows on TV.
“Wednesday” returned after a week off and while the show appears to be a work in progress as producers try to figure out what works and what doesn’t — segments continue to move in and out of the rundown, the format’s been flipped a few times and the direction of the show continues to shift — it’s clear that Simmons was much better as a podcast host, documentary producer and occasional columnist than he is a late-night TV host.
Simmons argued New York actor Michael Rapaport about Deflategate in a seven-minute “People’s Court” skit, which was basically a scripted version of the Week 1 Ben Affleck rant set inside before Judge Joe Brown’s courtroom. Simmons “won” the case, arguing Deflategate was nothing more than a distraction from the NFL’s many other more serious problems like concussions and CTE.
After five episodes, the Deflategate bit was further proof that Simmons’s attempts at comedy are just that. Attempts.
What he certainly isn’t is some kind of rebel with searing takes and headstrong ideas unless he’s disemboweling Jim Dolan and the Knicks – easy targets – or defending Tom Brady. While that’s what he was sold to us as, Simmons has been nothing more than an HBO cheerleader, which is surprising for a guy who rebuilt his personal brand the last year as some kind of bad boy.
Episode 5, which premiered this week, just happened to be the pep-ralliest installment. After the months of hype Simmons and this show got, it’s actually quite shocking how different the sales pitch was from reality.
Simmons was somehow touted as a defiant hero when he was fired from ESPN and scooped up by HBO’s pirate ship of rebels, but through five episodes of “Any Given Wednesday,” the creator of Grantland and the “30 for 30” documentary series has become HBO’s version of Andy Cohen, interviewing stars in a weird cross-promotional lounge for other HBO shows similar to Cohen’s “Housewives” reunions on Bravo.
Imagine Simmons, when he was at ESPN, having Skip Bayless and Stephen A. Smith on his podcast to promote “First Take.” Or assigning a Grantland oral history of “Outside the Lines.” Never in a million years, right? Well, all the money HBO threw at Simmons seems to have changed him, because through five weeks we sure have gotten a lot of native advertising.
Episode 5 featured three guests, two of whom continue to star in HBO shows. Danny McBride, who hilariously played Kenny Powers on “Eastbound and Down” and currently stars in “Vice Principals” was asked a series of Kenny Powers questions when his interview began.
Michael K. Williams, the brilliant actor who gave life to Omar on HBO’s “The Wire,” Chalky White on HBO’s “Boardwalk Empire,” and currently stars in HBO’s “The Night Of” sat for an interview alongside former “Mad Men” star Christina Hendricks to talk about some of Simmons’ favorite TV characters.
What’s next, is Spencer Strasmore from “Ballers” going to check in to talk about football economics?
While there were no in-show promos directing viewers to check out Williams and McBride in their new shows, it still felt funny that Simmons continues to go to the HBO publicity department to find guests for his show. The HBO cross-promotions have been evident from the first episode, which makes Simmons’ quote from earlier this year about how Michelle Obama is a dream guest seem like a total joke. Maybe if she had an HBO show.
It’s been building to the Episode 5 pep rally for weeks.
Episode 1 closed with an ode to HBO and Simmons talking about why he was so excited to be a part of the network he watched so much throughout his life.
Episode 2 featured guest Bill Hader, who recently inked a deal with HBO for a new comedy.
Episode 3 closed with a “Game of Thrones” segment that was a straight-up advertorial for the HBO show.
Episode 5, despite a clunky comedic bit about Deflategate plunked in the middle of it, was basically an in-house publicity package that aired while the rest of the country was waiting for Obama to speak at the Democratic Convention.
Speaking of politics, the sports world has, for the last month, taken on more social issues and many athletes, from Carmelo Anthony to Michael Jordan, have taken a stand on substantive issues. Yet, over the last six weeks, “Any Given Wednesday” hasn’t touched that tough stuff. A show that’s supposed to be about sports and culture has largely ignored important current events, which has never been the HBO way. Look at the network’s other studio shows, “Last Week Tonight with John Oliver” and “Real Time with Bill Maher,” and you’ll see two shows that are built around news and issues and things people care about.
“Wednesdays” seems to be built around its host’s adoration for his employers, which is a far cry from the bad boy Simmons was sold to us as.
“Hey, man, that was easy,” McBride said to Simmons at the end of his segment.
Of course it was. McBride was pitching in front of the home crowd.
