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10 highlights from the 2014 ESPYs

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LOS ANGELES – When I arrived at the Red Carpet for the 2014 ESPYs on Wednesday, I had a few expectations. There would be …

  • touching, memorable moments
  • hilariously dressed athletes
  • awkward moments

Check, check and check.

The ESPYs. What a genius idea. It’s the only place you can see John Calipari chilling with the Los Angeles Kings or Richard Sherman interacting with Danica Patrick. It’s the only place where I can get a fist pound from Chris Berman, take a selfie with Metta World Peace and get turned down for a selfie by Clint Dempsey (whatever, dude).

Now that all the awards have been handed out (the Seattle Seahawks won best team and here’s the rest) and we’re done letting Drake’s uncomfortably perfect jokes sink in, here are 10 highlights from the awards show:

1. Michael Sam

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Wow. Sam’s powerful acceptance speech for the Arthur Ashe Courage Award was one of the most memorable moments in the ESPYs history.

2. Stuart Scott

As for those aforementioned touching moments, there were plenty. Chris Berman introduced a tribute video for athletes that’ve passed in the past year, and then ESPN anchor Stuart Scott accepted the Jimmy V Award by telling the touching story of his ongoing battle with cancer. “Don’t ever give up” are the famous words that defined Valvano, and Scott epitomized them. “I’ve presented this award before and although intellectually I get it … at my gut level, I really didn’t think that I belonged with those people. (pauses) Now I do,” he said.

3. Josh Sweeney

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Of all the athletes I recognized on the red carpet, the one I didn’t was easily the most inspiring. Josh Sweeney was in a wheelchair. I introduced myself, asking him what award he was up for. “The Pat Tillman Award,” he said. Sweeney’s story is truly incredible. Forget championships, he’s got a Purple Heart and an Olympic Gold Medal.

4. Drake’s performance

It was the biggest question heading into the night. A hip-hop dude hosting the ESPYs? We know Drake’s singing/rapping career helped him start from the bottom and now he’s here. And we now know why his soap opera/acting career did not. After what started off as a funny yet uncomfortable opening act, he started performing. His “Honorable Mentions” and “Side Pieces” tracks hit home.

5. Drake’s bad jokes

Dan Marino’s face said it all during Drake’s opening monologue. Audience members and those on Twitter weren’t exactly feeling Drake’s vulgar sense of humor at first. A few lowlights: Making fun of Prince Fielder’s ESPN Body Issue picture, making an uncomfortable sex joke relating to Tim Howard’s goalkeeping and an unneeded poke at the Redskins.

6. Drake’s good jokes

He had his moments. Some highlights: “What does $40 million get you in Cleveland? … Cleveland.” His Johnny Manziel mushrooms joke was gut-busting. And his Lance Cam skit playing off Lance Stephenson’s blow-in-your-ear moment with LeBron James was quite comical. He also got friendzoned by Skylar Diggins.

7. Blake Griffin kind of saved the show

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Griffin’s try-not-to-laugh moment following Drake’s Donald Sterling joke was perfect. And his skit with Drake, “Drake vs. Blake or Blake vs. Drake” reassured us that Drake is actually funny. Drake had a fake interview with Bill Simmons in which he was impersonating Griffin and said, “I’m Blake Griffin, and I look like a black guy who jumped in a pit of Cheetohs.” Classic.

8. The intros

Easily the biggest pitfall of live shows. There were plenty of awkward moments, but there were also a bunch of well-done skits, including Floyd Mayweather (5-foot-8) and Maria Sharapova (6-foot-2), which also poked fun at Mayweather’s humble character.

9. The fashion

Russell Westbrook’s outfit was something only Russell Westbrook could wear. (Looking like a “walking bag of Skittles” according to Drake). His Oklahoma City Thunder teammate Kevin Durant was sporting a Leprechaun green suit. Fellow NBAer Damian Lillard was sporting a Fonzworth Bentley-esque getup. Danica Patrick voted best dressed by FTW readers.

10. The best jokes you didn’t hear

Let’s end with some behind-the-scenes access here. Heisman winner Jameis Winston is the most famous college football player. One autograph-seeking lady on the red carpet apparently didn’t know this. She shouted “JIMMY” at the top of her lungs. Shortly after Winston turned around and gave her a you-don’t-know-who-I-am eyebrow raise, some dude informed her, “He’s the dude who stole seafood.”

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