Working Rams-Jets on Fox, Thom Brennaman and Charles Davis deserve credit for two things: They didn’t fall asleep during L.A.’s 9-6 win. And they managed to let viewers know, without saying it, that they too thought the game sucked.
That message was also sent graphically. Like at the beginning of the fourth quarter, when Fox posted a graphic saying there had been 14 combined drives with 10 punts and five three-and-outs. The voices even got help from other Fox mouths. Like at halftime, when Terry Bradshaw, sarcastically, said: “We got an exciting game so stay tuned.” Not exactly an enthusiastic invitation to continue watching, right? Fox’s advertisers had to be thrilled.
Wonder how many eyeballs bailed out of the telecast after Bradshaw delivered the word? That said, the telecast was not totally jive free.
In the fourth quarter, Davis, who does have some Pollyanna in him, actually told viewers they were watching “two teams fighting for their playoff lives.
“I know people sit here and go (the Rams are) 3-5 (and the Jets are) 3-6… (But) these two are in a 6-6 game,” Davis said. “I know it’s not an artistic success. That doesn’t mean the effort isn’t there. It doesn’t mean the passion isn’t there.”
Was that line supposed to bring anyone, at least anyone still awake and watching, to tears?
Fortunately, Brennaman balanced out his partner’s double talk.
“When all we’re talking about is a 78-yard punt (by Johnny Hekker) and a missed extra point (by Nick Folk), clearly it has not been an offense dominated kind of day,” Brennaman said. What a polite fella!
At that very moment, it would’ve been nice if both voices had cartoon balloons coming out of their heads to let us know what they were really thinking. How about: If we have to spend three-plus hours describing this crap, Roger Goodell should be forced to watch it with his eyes pried open.
Let’s just say Fox’s sideline shots of the expressionless Todd Bowles were more exciting than the game itself. The quality of play, the lack of offense and imagination on that side of the ball, provided another reason why the NFL’s TV ratings are in decline.
At the top of SNY’s Jets postgame program, analyst Chad Casscadden said he had to gulp down two cups of coffee just to stay awake for the show.
Imagine how many cups Brennaman and Davis swigged?
CHALLENGING PEREIRA
In the land of pregame show Gasbags, the topic of the NFL going to full-time officials is getting personal. Matthew Hasselbeck, who made his pitch for full-time zebras last week, was banging the drum again on ESPN’s Sunday “Countdown,” and taking on Fox’s Mystic High Exalted Ruler of rules, Mike Pereira, in the process.
“I heard Mike Pereira, the former director of officials, say: ‘Well, I just don’t know what a side judge would do all week.’ Well I do,” Hasselbeck said. “He would train the next generation of referees and officials.”
Some righteous thinking Valley of the Stupid G-Bag should get Hasselbeck and Pereira on the air for a debate.
GANGING UP
The dismantling of Muhammad Wilkerson’s reputation continues.
On NFLN’s “GameDay First,” Ian Rapoport, who works out of the NFL’s Manhattan headquarters (Big Brother is watching, right?), said that “before” Wilkerson signed his new deal with the Jets he was brought into a meeting with his agent, Bowles, and other Jets suits.
“Where (in the meeting) he (Wilkerson) promised that he would behave, promised he would be on his best behavior,” Rapoport said. “Obviously, based on recent events, that has not happened.”
Michael Robinson, the “GameDay First” analyst, immediately went off on whoever leaked the story. “What’s with the Jets?” Robinson asked. “Remember snitches get stitches.”
We can only hope this ugly situation gets a lot uglier.
SIMMS’ 1-ON-1
Who knew Phil Simms didn’t need help from Jim Nantz, Norman Julius Esiason, or even Brandon Marshall?
Simms, obviously auditioning for a “60 Minutes” gig, went one-on-one with Drew Brees on CBS’ “The NFL Today” and got the Saints QB to smack around Goodell by simply asking: “If I was Roger Goodell….”
Brees gave the commish an F- for the way he hands out discipline. “And you feel there’s an agenda at play. … It’s just been a huge mess,” Brees said. “The thing that needs to happen is some neutral party that the league and the union work with when it comes to any type of discipline of that magnitude (BountyGate, Ray Rice, Tom Brady) that’s going to be handed down.”
Wow, now when we see Scott Pelley we are going to think Phil Simms.
IF I HAD A NICKEL…
Either ESPN’s Charles Woodson was doing shtick or his priorities are cockeyed?
With all the legit issues swirling around the NFL, Woodson thought Sunday was a great day to champion a new cause.
“The Pro Bowl needs to have a category for the nickel back position,” Woodson proclaimed.
Pro Bowl talk in November? And a nickel back crusade, no less? Woodson can do better than that.
POLITICAL FOOTBALL
Was Chris Berman talking in codes? Was there some kind of hidden message?
Berman opened ESPN’s pregame show saying: “Our sources say we have had a presidential election. We’ll have to confirm that.” Was this some kind of protest by Berman?
Or was it a desperate plea for Rush Limbaugh to return to the cast of “Countdown?”
BULLY PULPIT
Why is NFLN analyst Shaun O’Hara picking on Mike Garafolo, one of the network’s most diligent AND entertaining reporters? Early Sunday morning, O’Hara said Garafolo “is dressed like a limo driver.”
Perhaps this intimidated Mr. G into predicting the Giants, O’Hara’s former team, will make a run in the NFC East.
The next time O’Hara appears wearing one of his Zoot Suits, Garafolo should point out the garment looks a couple of sizes too small.
POPE HAD IT FIRST … AGAIN
In case anyone forgot, Mike (Sports Pope) Francesa was there to remind you. During his Sunday sermon from the FAN balcony, His Holiness was preaching about Bryce Petty.
And the Pope’s soliloquy was more about how HE told the unwashed masses, on FRIDAY, that Petty would be the Jets starting QB.
Amazing!
