DEAR ABBY: Am I obligated to give people a free ride just because I am going to the same place or in the same direction? Too often people who barely speak to us suddenly remember we exist when they want something, especially if they or their child needs a ride somewhere.
Sometimes, they give lame excuses like, “Oh. I’m almost out of gas.” Other times it’s that they have chosen to do something else -- like go to a party -- instead of picking up their child.
I don’t mind helping occasionally, but it’s to the point where I feel these people know they can do whatever else they wish because they know I’ll pick up the slack. I’m tired of being the chauffeur. I don’t want to make waves, but how can I say no? -- UNHAPPY DRIVER IN LOUISIANA
DEAR DRIVER: Here’s how. The next time you feel imposed upon, speak up and just say NO, that it ISN’T convenient. Do not feel obligated to go into detail or lie about why not. If this makes waves, it means that your relationship with that person wasn’t friendship, but transactional.
DEAR READERS: Happy St. Patrick’s Day.
May you always have
A sunbeam to warm you
Good luck to charm you
And a sheltering angel
So nothing can harm you.
Laughter to cheer you
Faithful friends near you
And whenever you pray,
Heaven to hear you.
LOVE, ABBY
Stories by Abigail Van Buren
- Dear Abby: Brothers shirk duty to care for dad with Alzheimer’s
- Dear Abby: Husband’s quiet, underlying rage freezes wife into non-action when what she wants is freedom
- Dear Abby: We can’t believe our rude friends allow their dog to sit at our dinner table
- Dear Abby: Newlywed regrets marrying woman who wants to join police force
- Dear Abby: She loves her younger boyfriend so much she let his new woman move in
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.