Carolyn Hax: Is it a wife’s role to broker peace between her husband and sons?

Dear Carolyn: I consider myself a good feminist, so I normally avoid talking in terms of gender roles, yet here I am. Is it the role of a wife and mother to help bridge a rift between a father and his grown sons?

When I have an argument with one of my sons, leading us to not communicate for a time, she just goes merrily along as if it’s none of her business. Sometimes a son needs to have explained how his actions hurt his dad, and sometimes Dad needs to be told why those actions were important to the son.