Here are the fruits of being rejected by business associates

Sometime around 1100BC, a man had an affair with what the Bible referred to as a harlot (anything from a brazen strumpet to an adulterous woman).

From this illicit relationship, Jephthah was born to the indignation of the man’s legitimate sons. They took action and ejected him from the household, stating clearly, why they took this drastic action using choice words to describe Jephthah’s mother.

He left home and, like King David, gathered around men regarded as worthless and forged them into an elite fighting force. When his father’s household came under attack from marauding armies they sent a delegation of elders to plead with Jephthah to save them from certain doom.

He who they had so much contempt for that they could not bear sharing living space with had, on account of his talent, ability and competence in war, become the asset they could not live without. He accepted the assignment and with it, the position of head of the entire region.

In 1985, Steve Jobs, who founded Apple at 21, became a millionaire at 23 and led the company into the Fortune 500 before he was 30. He was fired from the company he had set up.

The board felt that his emphasis on the Mac (which, according to CEO John Sculley, they considered a toy) was detrimental to the company’s interest.

Depressed, bitter and despondent at his fate, Jobs ventured out to form two successful companies, NeXT and Pixar and to become a family man.

In his 2005 commencement speech at Stanford University, Jobs said: “I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that being fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.”

Apple also benefited from this move; when Jobs returned in 1997, he was better refined at leading and managing large organisations.

Local Leaders of Family Business will, unfortunately, go through phases where their own ventures reject them.

Rather than letting the parting of ways turn into a public or legal spectacle, competent leaders should quietly walk away confident that they will succeed in anything else they do.

Leaders of Family Business may, within their lifetimes, find themselves being ejected from the very institutions that they have invested their lifeblood to set up or grow exponentially.

Difficult task

This rejection can be devastating because it is often carried out by people who they love and who they thought loved them back.

However, it can also create opportunities for them to discover new strengths, refresh or restore themselves after the gruelling rigours of business building and to invest time in their own family which usually suffers the most during the business building phases.

No Leader of Family Business should be so invested in a venture that they cannot imagine a future outside the enterprise.

Whereas their talents and abilities may be irreplaceable (as family ventures soon discover after ejecting key personnel), they can be applied in a variety of settings, earn the leader personal satisfaction and generate financial rewards.

Building from scratch or reinvigorating a flagging family business is an immensely difficult task that can take a physical and mental toll upon leaders who bear most of the responsibility for its wellbeing.

Even when leaders take days off from the venture, its affairs will inadvertently follow them wherever they go.

Ejection from the enterprise may be an excellent opportunity to step away from the business without feeling guilty or being held accountable for results.

Nuclear families often suffer the most from the leader’s single-minded investment into building or sustaining a business venture.

They are the ones who never see their spouse/parent, who often have to attend significant events alone or singlehandedly manage household dynamics.

Any opportunity afforded to the leader, even through rejection from the business venture, can be used to reconstruct relationships and restore what matters most to any true leader; a family.

Mr Mutua is a Humphrey Fellow, leadership development consultant and author of the book “The African Prince” available on Amazon Kindle. His email address is [email protected].