At 21-years-old, Carli Lloyd was at a career crossroad.
She could fully immerse herself in soccer, placing the sport above everything — and everyone — in her life in her quest to land a spot on the U.S. Women’s National Team or she could get her degree from Rutgers and enter the workforce like the rest of her classmates.
Everyone knows what the World Cup champion chose, but few know that her success came at a steep price, costing her a relationship with her family.
In an excerpt from her upcoming book — WHEN NOBODY WAS WATCHING: My Hard-Fought Journey to the Top of the Soccer World — Lloyd details how a decision to connect with Australian coach James Galanis — at her father’s urging, no less — eventually led to her estranged relationship with her family.
“When my father had open-heart surgery, nobody told me until well afterward. When my sister got married, I was not invited,” Lloyd writes in the book, out Sept. 26, with author Wayne Coffey.
Lloyd details a series of events playing a role in the relationships disintegration — rebuffing her parents’ request to pick an agent for her; recoiling at critiques from her father, who was her first coach, about her game — but highlights two events that ultimately led to her family fallout.
When Lloyd stood by controversial U.S. goalie Hope Solo after she unloaded on their coach following her benching in the 2007 World Cup — the 4-0 loss to Brazil is the worst in the tournament’s history for the Americans — her parents were critical of her decision and blamed Galanis for giving her bad advice.
Then, heading into the 2008 Olympics, a contentious conversation with her father ended with him kicking Lloyd out of the family’s New Jersey home.
“I can’t believe it has reached this point. But true to stubborn form, I don’t back down,” Lloyd writes.
“I drive over to the house, pull up in front and take a breath. I look at the side yard — my original home field. Being nostalgic is not my natural inclination, but it’s inevitable given the circumstances.
“I walk in the house and head straight upstairs. This is the saddest day of my life. I begin packing up all my belongings. My mother and sister come into my room and we all start crying. I am overwhelmed. I can’t even believe this is happening.”
Lloyd said that she left her childhood home around midnight and cried the entire drive back to her boyfriend’s house.
“It feels so final, so crushing. I’ve lived my whole life in that house. And now my own family doesn’t want me anymore,” Lloyd, now 34, writes in the excerpt that is featured by Sports Illustrated.
Seven years later, Lloyd completes the greatest year of her career. She leads the U.S. women to their first World Cup since 1999, and is FIFA’s 2015 Player of the Year. But she shares those accolades with Galanis and her boyfriend, Brian Hollins — not her family.
“I love my family and would like nothing more than to reconcile with them. Nobody has done more for me than my parents, who devoted untold amounts of time and money that allowed me to play the game I love,” Lloyd writes. “It’s no exaggeration to say I never would have gotten anywhere near a World Cup, an Olympics or even the U.S. national team without them. I have never forgotten that, and I never will.”
