Quickfire: prioritise short term job for more money or stay here?
July 8, 2017 3:10 PM Subscribe
I have been offered a 9 day job in another location that will allow me to make extra cash - cash that I need if I don't want to dip into my savings. But I am currently stressing about moving abroad in 2 months and feel that every moment is precious with my partner.
I am soon moving abroad and the transition is going to be more expensive than I anticipated. This means that I will certainly need to dip into savings for the initial month or so of living in my new country.
Aside from this: I am feeling really stressed about the impending move. Over the last week or 2 I am actively managing this with yoga, dancing, time spent with my partner and time spent outdoors etc. My partner and I have tentative plans to spend time together next weekend - he has been going through a very difficult time lately, so this is a priority to me. Managing my own mental health is also big on the list. My options are
Next Week 1: Be thrown in at the deep end at a new company for 9 days living in an isolated location alongside a team, earning extra $$ for practical things I need. This will be relatively relentless, so I won't really have much downtime, other than eat/sleep. But it will ease the pressure RE financial worries a little.
OR
Alternative next week Remain here, working on a single project that will make significantly less money, but be able to continue partaking in yoga/other relaxing activities and time spent with partner. I am looking at ways I can make up the money in a couple of months, but will probably still need take a little out of savings in the short-term.
My head is mashed and I feel so tired that I am struggling to figure out the best course of action. I need to figure it out asap, help me lovely mefites!
I am soon moving abroad and the transition is going to be more expensive than I anticipated. This means that I will certainly need to dip into savings for the initial month or so of living in my new country.
Aside from this: I am feeling really stressed about the impending move. Over the last week or 2 I am actively managing this with yoga, dancing, time spent with my partner and time spent outdoors etc. My partner and I have tentative plans to spend time together next weekend - he has been going through a very difficult time lately, so this is a priority to me. Managing my own mental health is also big on the list. My options are
Next Week 1: Be thrown in at the deep end at a new company for 9 days living in an isolated location alongside a team, earning extra $$ for practical things I need. This will be relatively relentless, so I won't really have much downtime, other than eat/sleep. But it will ease the pressure RE financial worries a little.
OR
Alternative next week Remain here, working on a single project that will make significantly less money, but be able to continue partaking in yoga/other relaxing activities and time spent with partner. I am looking at ways I can make up the money in a couple of months, but will probably still need take a little out of savings in the short-term.
My head is mashed and I feel so tired that I am struggling to figure out the best course of action. I need to figure it out asap, help me lovely mefites!
I would take the job.
Moving is stressful, and unexpected expenses crop up all the time. If this'll help both alleviate financial stress and help buffer against expenses, I'd go for it. It's only 9 days.
posted by spinifex23 at 3:27 PM on July 8, 2017 [6 favorites]
Moving is stressful, and unexpected expenses crop up all the time. If this'll help both alleviate financial stress and help buffer against expenses, I'd go for it. It's only 9 days.
posted by spinifex23 at 3:27 PM on July 8, 2017 [6 favorites]
You don't have to take every opportunity that knocks. It's ok to turn down the job.
posted by aniola at 3:38 PM on July 8, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by aniola at 3:38 PM on July 8, 2017 [3 favorites]
Moving abroad is really stressful. There are many kinds of stress besides financial stress. I've moved abroad and home again and it was hard in each direction. If I were doing this, I would stay home and not take the other gig. The time with your partner, yoga, and other activities are like deposits toward your mental, physical, and emotional well-being. You will face a lot of demands as part of your big move. One of the reasons people save is to have a cushion when things are rough financially. So taking money out of savings isn't a sin, particularly if you make a realistic plan to replace the money when you can. Good luck!
posted by Bella Donna at 3:53 PM on July 8, 2017 [5 favorites]
posted by Bella Donna at 3:53 PM on July 8, 2017 [5 favorites]
Can partner take some time off and travel to wherever you're going to be? Even if you're socked in with work, you might find you have more time than you thought you would, and besides it might be a good mental break for them even if there isn't a ton of interesting stuff to do in the area (there always is). You can do yoga anywhere.
posted by rhizome at 7:03 PM on July 8, 2017
posted by rhizome at 7:03 PM on July 8, 2017
I'm about to move across the country, so I totally relate. I'm sitting in an empty apartment getting ready to sleep here for the last time. So I'm you from the future, more or less.
Under no circumstances but the imminent likelihood of extreme poverty would I take that job. Moving is stressful, and you have a routine that's mostly keeping your anxiety managed. Don't disrupt that. Don't lose the time with your partner, especially when they are having a rough time too. Don't prioritise money over taking care of yourself and your partner.
There is never enough time. Don't steal the last bit of time from yourself in order to make money. This is what savings is for.
posted by guster4lovers at 10:23 PM on July 8, 2017 [2 favorites]
Under no circumstances but the imminent likelihood of extreme poverty would I take that job. Moving is stressful, and you have a routine that's mostly keeping your anxiety managed. Don't disrupt that. Don't lose the time with your partner, especially when they are having a rough time too. Don't prioritise money over taking care of yourself and your partner.
There is never enough time. Don't steal the last bit of time from yourself in order to make money. This is what savings is for.
posted by guster4lovers at 10:23 PM on July 8, 2017 [2 favorites]
Best answer: I believe this is a follow-up to your previous question about the job. Assuming so, I would suggest to AskMeFi answerers that they please read the previous one.
Based on that previous question, I would urge you NOT to take the short-term away job. Stay home for now and do the lower-paying work, then go off to Spain for your 9-month adventure.
In your older question, you said that you had gotten a job offer in Spain which you really longed to take. You have emotional connections to the country and the language. But you also met a great guy and have a fantastic, loving relationship in Britain. People generally encouraged you to take the job -- I think that was a good choice. (But: Phone sex! Lots of phone sex! I am not kidding!)
Given the strain about separation which you were already feeling previously, I think the 9-day gig is just a straw on the camel's back. You've obviously worked out something between the two of you which you'll try to live with, but that means the together-time between now and Spain is even more valuable.
As you point out, you already have the money. This is not a make-or-break for your Spanish trip. And it's not a job experience that will fulfill you in any other way.
Unlike the Spain trip, you really don't seem to have any desire to do this short-term job besides easing the anxiety of dipping into your savings. I wonder if maybe this is a "free floating" anxiety slopping over from the stress about your upcoming trip, as well as the worries in your old post. If that's true, then even if you do spend from your savings, the money concern will fade once you've settled into Spain.
Now I'm going to try to put myself in your boyfriend's shoes:
If he's like myself and other people I know, he has a part of his mind that's a little devil suggesting the worst interpretation of things. We can usually shut it up, but it's always there. The devil says to your BF: She doesn't really love you enough, she's off putting her own gratification ahead of your relationship, it'll be that way in the future too. Now this is crap, you know that, and he knows that. He's beaten it back because he knows how important your Spain thing is to your soul. But this short-term job, which is really about nothing but a little extra money, in the middle of a time critical to the success of your relationship, gives the devil some extra ammunition.
People will say "if he's a keeper then he'll stand by you," as they did in the previous thread. And that's true, and I'm sure he will try his best, but you also have to make allowances for him being human and immature. And the same allowances for yourself. Take care of yourself, OK?
posted by Harvey Kilobit at 2:22 AM on July 9, 2017 [1 favorite]
Based on that previous question, I would urge you NOT to take the short-term away job. Stay home for now and do the lower-paying work, then go off to Spain for your 9-month adventure.
In your older question, you said that you had gotten a job offer in Spain which you really longed to take. You have emotional connections to the country and the language. But you also met a great guy and have a fantastic, loving relationship in Britain. People generally encouraged you to take the job -- I think that was a good choice. (But: Phone sex! Lots of phone sex! I am not kidding!)
Given the strain about separation which you were already feeling previously, I think the 9-day gig is just a straw on the camel's back. You've obviously worked out something between the two of you which you'll try to live with, but that means the together-time between now and Spain is even more valuable.
As you point out, you already have the money. This is not a make-or-break for your Spanish trip. And it's not a job experience that will fulfill you in any other way.
Unlike the Spain trip, you really don't seem to have any desire to do this short-term job besides easing the anxiety of dipping into your savings. I wonder if maybe this is a "free floating" anxiety slopping over from the stress about your upcoming trip, as well as the worries in your old post. If that's true, then even if you do spend from your savings, the money concern will fade once you've settled into Spain.
Now I'm going to try to put myself in your boyfriend's shoes:
If he's like myself and other people I know, he has a part of his mind that's a little devil suggesting the worst interpretation of things. We can usually shut it up, but it's always there. The devil says to your BF: She doesn't really love you enough, she's off putting her own gratification ahead of your relationship, it'll be that way in the future too. Now this is crap, you know that, and he knows that. He's beaten it back because he knows how important your Spain thing is to your soul. But this short-term job, which is really about nothing but a little extra money, in the middle of a time critical to the success of your relationship, gives the devil some extra ammunition.
People will say "if he's a keeper then he'll stand by you," as they did in the previous thread. And that's true, and I'm sure he will try his best, but you also have to make allowances for him being human and immature. And the same allowances for yourself. Take care of yourself, OK?
posted by Harvey Kilobit at 2:22 AM on July 9, 2017 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Thanks for helping me mull this over. I have decided to stay home and not take the job. Boyfriend also turned down a short term job this summer so we are close to each other until I go - I think it's only right that I do the same. I have also spoken to an old colleague in Spain who thinks he can get me extra hours that will cover the initial costs when I get there. I may not have to dip into savings much at all.
When I woke this morning I was physically rested but mentally tired. I think saving up my mental deposits etc is going to be a priority along with sensible spending over the next couple of months.
posted by Kat_Dubs at 4:23 AM on July 9, 2017 [4 favorites]
When I woke this morning I was physically rested but mentally tired. I think saving up my mental deposits etc is going to be a priority along with sensible spending over the next couple of months.
posted by Kat_Dubs at 4:23 AM on July 9, 2017 [4 favorites]
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by jojobobo at 3:13 PM on July 8, 2017 [9 favorites]