UK Edition
Premier League Bingo: How many points can you pick up from this weekend's action?
West Ham United vs Chelsea (Saturday, 12.30pm)
5 points: The London Stadium is full of festive cheer and good will to all men after Chelsea dismantle West Ham in a 4-1 away win.
15 points: There are six minutes stoppage time and the end of the game and Gary Cahill's elbows are responsible for five of them.
25 points: Karen Brady takes a break from watching a rabble of disorganised, bone-headed egomaniacs and decides to go back to the Apprentice.
Burnley vs Watford (Saturday, 3pm)
5 points: The race for seventh remains in the balance after a 2-2 draw.
15 points: Andre Gray scored against his former club with only his fifth shot of the season - and of course refuses to celebrate.
25 points: Tony Gale notices that Richarlison is wearing gloves and wonders if he'll 'fancy' a trip to Turf Moor. Yes, the Richarlison who had a gun put to his head as a teenager in a turf war in Brazil.
Crystal Palace vs Bournemouth (Saturday, 3pm)
5 points: Palace continue their incremental improvement under Roy Hodgson with a 2-1 home win.
15 points: Harry Arter breaks a Premier League record for on-field yapping.
25 points: Christian Benteke spends the night before the game in a tent in one of the Selhurst Park goalmouths to try and reacquaint himself with the net.
Huddersfield vs Brighton (Saturday, 3pm)
5 points: David Wagner's side struggle to create chances once again in a 0-0.
15 points: 58-year-old Chris Hughton is described as an up-and-coming British manager.
25 points: 72 per cent of the nation long for the return of Leeds and Sheffield Wednesday to avoid these bland fixtures.
Swansea vs West Brom (Saturday, 3pm)
5 points: Alan Pardew gets his first win as West Brom manager, and lays the ghost of Palace's 5-4 defeat at the Liberty to rest.
15 points: Paul Clement makes sure there are no Carabao advertising hoardings.
25 points: Tony Pulis is on the Goals on Sunday sofa and says he would be interested in a Premier League return. What a well-timed appearance...
Tottenham Hotspur vs Stoke (Saturday, 3pm)
5 points: Spurs get their first league win since the release of Mauricio Pochettino's book.
15 points: Erik Lamela creates a goal in his first Spurs league start for more than a year.
25 points: Mark Hughes gets jeered by Stoke fans at Euston station, which becomes a Twitter sensation.
Newcastle vs Leicester (Saturday, 5.30pm)
5 points: Jamie Vardy becomes Leicester's first player to reach 50 Premier League goals.
15 points: Pundits question Claude Puel for trying to change Leicester's style of play. Yes, the style of play that had them just above the relegation zone when he took over.
25 points: Ray Winstone's half-time advert offers 3/1 that Newcastle's takeover lasts longer than the Brexit negotiations.
Southampton vs Arsenal (Sunday, 12pm)
5 points: Arsenal win their third consecutive game at their former bogey ground St Mary's.
15 points: Shkodran Mustafi passes a late pride test and is deemed fit to start the game.
25 points: BT Sport's decision to pick an Arsenal-Southampton combined XI opens the gates of Twitter hell.
Liverpool vs Everton (Saturday, 2.15pm)
5 points: Liverpool cruise to 3-1 win in the 'Friendly Derby'.
15 points: Jurgen Klopp is quick to remind Sam Allardyce that he once called him a 'soft German'.
25 points: Sky have to issue at least a dozen apologies for any bad language that passed across their microphones whenever Wayne Rooney takes a throw-in.
Man Utd vs Man City (Sunday, 4.30pm)
5 points: Pep Guardiola's side pull off a repeat of last season's 2-1 and effectively end the title race.
15 points: We are told City's centre-backs 'have a mistake in them' a dozen times, yet they don't make a mistake.
25 points: Sky Sports replace Graeme Souness with Liam Gallagher at the last minute and manage to do what Alan McGee, Bonehead and their mother had previously failed - get him and Noel to make the peace.