(Click here to skip down to the winning timeline items from our 2019 Year in Preview.)
How to format your entry so that the Empress can sort them without going even insaner:
Please write each entry on its own line, as WORDFROMTHEGRID (without spaces even if you interpret it as multiple words): [your clue],” as in the examples above. You can explain it after the clue, as with RIBS above.
Note: This is an American-style crossword, not the British type in which the clue is a sentence containing an anagram of the word.
This Los Angeles Times crossword ran in The Post’s Style section on Jan. 9; if you like, you can see the original clues at wapo.st/invite-crossword-1315.
Submit entries at wapo.st/enter-invite-1315 (all lowercase).
Winner gets the Lose Cannon, our new Style Invitational trophy. Second place receives the very cool — and appropriately titled for us — book “Inked: Clever, Odd and Outrageous Tattoos”; we can vouch for all three adjectives just by seeing the cover photo, which depicts a blue-eyed human face tattooed onto the back of someone’s bald head, with the man’s fringe of hair serving as a curly mustache. Donated by Roy Ashley.
Other runners-up win our “You Gotta Play to Lose” Loser Mug or our “Whole Fools” Grossery Bag. Honorable mentions get one of our lusted-after Loser magnets, “We’ve Seen Better” or “IDiot Card.” First Offenders receive only a smelly tree-shaped air “freshener” (FirStink for their first ink). Deadline is Monday night, Jan. 28; results published Feb. 17 (online Thursday, Feb. 14, as our special valentine — or non- — to you). See general contest rules and guidelines at wapo.st/InvRules. The headline “Lies Ahead” is by Dave Prevar; Chris Doyle and Tom Witte each suggested the honorable-mentions subhead. Join the Style Invitational Devotees on Facebook at on.fb.me/invdev. “Like” Style Invitational Ink of the Day on Facebook at bit.ly/inkofday; follow @StyleInvite on Twitter.
The Style Conversational The Empress's weekly online column discusses each new contest and set of results. Especially if you plan to enter, check it out at wapo.st/styleconv.
LIES AHEAD: OUR YEAR IN PREVIEW
In Week 1311, our Year in Preview, we asked you to tell us what “happened” in 2019. In the timeline below, some of the dates are relevant to the entry; others are just whatever.
4th place:
June 6: The nation celebrates the 75th anniversary of D-Day. The president forgoes the trip to Normandy, citing jaw spurs. (Daniel Helming, Trenton, N.J.)
3rd place:
Nov. 6: Beto O’Rourke loses election for dogcatcher, but his rousing concession speech vaults him to the lead in Democratic presidential primaries. (John Hutchins, Silver Spring, Md.)
2nd place
and the Oreo music box:
Oct. 31: At the request of Make-a-Wish, Trump delivers candy to a hospitalized child, telling her, “I hope you appreciate this, because the docs just told me you have two, maybe three days left tops.” (Jeff Contompasis, Ashburn, Va.)
And the winner of the Lose Cannon:
Sept. 22: The National Council of Teachers of English disbands after a violent battle over inserting a comma into MeToo. (Ira Allen, Bethesda)
Prophets and loss: Honorable mentions
Jan. 20: Rudy Giuliani declares that Trump has been totally vindicated and condemns Robert Mueller for “not even trying to find the criminal, Individual 1.” (Frank Osen, Pasadena, Calif.)
Jan. 29: At its quarterly meeting, the Fed sharply lowers its rate of interest in the president’s tweets. (Gary Crockett, Chevy Chase, Md.)
Feb. 3: Trump is forced to postpone a threatened war with Mexico because Steve Mnuchin’s family is still on vacation in Puerto Vallarta. (Frank Osen)
Feb. 4: The Dow Jones index breaks 30,000 for the first time, then closes at 7,328 three hours later. People shrug, figuring it’ll go back up tomorrow. (Jon Ketzner, Cumberland, Md.)
Feb. 11: Post Malone wins a Grammy for best mumbled-word album. (Jeff Contompasis)
March 7: On World Math Day, the president states that he can divide by zero. “I write down a number, draw a line under it, then put a zero below that. It’s very, very easy for someone like me.” (John McCooey, Rehoboth Beach, Del.)
March 21: In a last-minute deal, the EU trades the UK and a country to be named later for Bryce Harper. (Kevin Dopart, Washington)
March 28: Lawyers arguing before the Supreme Court discreetly look the other way when Justice Kavanaugh, in the middle of an important oral argument, boofs. (Duncan Stevens, Vienna, Va.)
April 1: In a plea bargain, El Chapo is freed after agreeing to pay $5 billion for the border wall. (Bruce Carlson, Alexandria)
April 14: The NRA announces, proactively, that there will be nothing that could have been done. (Art Grinath, Takoma Park)
April 15: Ruth Bader Ginsburg wins the Boston Marathon, throws her lace collar into the air in celebration. (Lynne Larkin, Vero Beach, Fla.)
April 25: After tornadoes tear through several Oklahoma towns, Trump tweets that residents could have prevented them had they “used leaf blowers.” (Duncan Stevens)
May 5: The president’s outreach to Latino voters hits a snag when Trump observes Cinco de Mayo by tossing out jars of Hellmann’s. (Duncan Stevens)
May 14: Finally able to compromise, Congress approves funds for a 3-foot border wall. (Selma Ellis, Rolling Meadows, Ill.)
May 29: . The new Facebook user agreement gives the company access to the user’s internal organs. (Art Grinath)
June 1: Elizabeth Warren reveals that she is a 1/64 owner of the Washington Redskins. (Mark Raffman, Reston, Va.)
June 2: Jimmy Carter announces he’ll seek second term as president; he immediately jumps to top of the polls. (Jon Ketzner)
June 18: A woman calls 911 to report a suspicious black man lurking in an affluent D.C. neighborhood, brandishing some sort of trigger device. Police later apologize to Mr. Obama, tell him his begonias are lovely, and return his garden hose. (Hildy Zampella, Alexandria, Va.)
July 20: At the Comet Ping Pong pizza parlor, Trump commemorates the 50th anniversary of the moon landing hoax. (Kevin Dopart)
July 22: Melania Trump shows up to the NAACP national convention wearing a white sheet and hood with the words “I really Kan’t Kare Kan U.” Her aides later say they don’t see what the fuss is about. (Art Grinath)
July 25: Ben and Jerry’s finds unprecedented success in Massachusetts, New York and California with its new flavor, Peach Mint. (Ken Gallant, Sequim, Wash.)
Aug. 1: Last year’s dance craze, “flossing,” is replaced by this year’s dance craze, “removing ear wax.” (Lawrence McGuire, Waldorf, Md.)
Aug. 15: Trump alleges that the influx of Cuban baseball players has led to “an epidemic of stolen bases.” (Mark Raffman)
Aug. 30: The latest Secretary of the Interior curates a hunting safari for Don Jr. and Eric at the National Zoo. (Kevin Dopart)
Sept. 1: After Melania Trump is mistakenly deported, Chief of Staff/ OMB Director Mick Mulvaney is named Acting First Lady. (Bob Kruger, Rockville, Md.)
Sept. 5: After an opening-game defeat in which the entire offensive line, two quarterbacks, a linebacker, three defensive backs, the punter, the head trainer, a water boy, several cheerleaders, and all of the trombones in the Redskins Marching Band succumbed to injuries, the team acknowledges that it is cursed and will change its name to the Landover Leprechauns. (Dave Airozo, Silver Spring, Md.)
Sept. 13: Trump abruptly tweets that he is withdrawing U.S. troops from Wakanda. (Larry McClemons, Annandale, Va.)
Oct. 10: For the first time since becoming vice president, Pence disagrees with President Trump, stating firmly that the toilet paper should hang over the roll. (Drew Bennett, West Plains, Mo.)
Oct. 22: Ruth Bader Ginsburg is named the point guard for the Washington Wizards. (Rick Haynes, Boynton Beach, Fla.)
Nov. 9: On the 30th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall, Trump tweets: “Tore down beautiful wall! SO WEAK! Shd have built it higher!” (Duncan Stevens)
Nov 18: Kavanaugh is spotted leaving Ginsburg’s house at 4 a.m. He says they were playing “a drinking game.” She says they were playing pinochle. (Tom Witte, Montgomery Village, Md.)
Nov. 23: After yet another acquisition by Jeff Bezos, The Post decides to include the parenthetical disclaimer only when mentioning an entity he doesn’t own. (Jennifer Gittins-Harfst, Annandale, Va.)
Nov. 30: Pink Floyd commemorates the 40th anniversary of “The Wall” by releasing a smaller edition called “Steel Slats.” (Jesse Frankovich, Grand Ledge, Mich.)
Dec. 1: Melania Trump unveils this year’s White House holiday decorations, which feature a festive motif based on the Spanish Inquisition. (Frank Osen)
Dec. 7: News of President Trump’s imminent resignation is sent as a text alert in the state of Hawaii, causing great consternation when it is found to be a false alarm. (Jonathan Jensen, Baltimore)
Still running — deadline Monday night, Jan. 21 — our “joint legislation” contest. See wapo.st/invite1314.
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