—
Something I have noticed recently in the West: meditation is prescribed for everything from mental health to career direction to cancer.
While meditation has shown to have positive effects, such as lower blood pressure, lower stress, and is no doubt a useful tool and spiritual practice, it does have its limitations – and even some risks.
Let’s explore these limitations and risks:
MEDITATION CAN BE VERY DIFFICULT
For myself included, meditation can be challenging – it certainly has that quality of wanting to make you jump out of your skin.
Many people I know find it very hard to sit and just be with their thoughts, breath or body, particularly if they have experienced trauma or have post-traumatic stress disorder.
MEDITATION CAN TAKE A LONG TIME TO MASTER
I have one friend who says he gets profound insights from meditation. While I am happy that he gets these results, let’s just consider the following for a moment:
- He’s pretty much a full-time Buddhist
- He’s meditated for 10+ years
So yes, I am sure it does get more comfortable – and like anything, practice makes permanently better.
However, most of us do not have 10 years or time to be a full-time Buddhist (nor do we perhaps want to be).
EXTENSIVE MEDITATION CAN CAUSE DEPERSONALISATION
Studies show that meditation has been shown to cause depersonalisation/derealisation, which is a strange and frightening experience, where life does not feel “real” and takes on a very dream-like quality. It’s like being awake, only you do not feel awake, and you cannot do magical things like ride dinosaurs and surf clouds as you can in the actual dream world.
Sadly, some meditation retreats are irresponsibly intense and do not have much in the way of “integration” back into reality.
Unfortunately, men can have a tendency to overdo and to go into extremes. It’s interesting how some eastern meditation practitioners would do things such as starve themselves in the name of meditation and enlightenment or meditating until their legs are gangrenous. This happened to the Buddhist monk Bodhidharma, who had to have his legs amputated after meditating so long.
Such endeavors to me seem masochistic as if proving how much physical pain one can tolerate is an indication of enlightenment.
Alarmingly, in the west, we have “intense meditation retreats”. Days upon days of nothing but silence and meditation, for as long as 10-14 days consecutively. Will we soon start seeing meditation marathons spanning for even longer? If so, they should certainly come with health warnings.
Women in today’s modern society are also exhibiting signs of “masculine masochism”: one woman, Tenzin Palmo, a Buddhist who claims to have spent 12 years in a cave. That couldn’t have been very comfortable.
EXTENSIVE MEDITATION CAN CAUSE PSYCHOTIC SYMPTOMS
There have been numerous reports of adverse mental health effects lasting for years following attendance at a meditation retreat.
I remember how when I told one woman I was struggling with burnout symptoms and needed time off, she adamantly advised me to go on a 10-day silent meditation retreat where you meditate for 12 hours a day.
I told her, “That sounds quite intense and doesn’t sound very healthy to me!”
We then ended up having a long debate, to which she concluded with “Don’t judge it until you try it”, to which I replied, “Well you could use that same argument with hard drugs – are you going to try them?”
I, of course, could have ended the argument using two words:
“Fair enough”.
In any case, remember that Buddhist friend I mentioned? Well, he said that his particular Buddhist community was against such intense retreats as they have been known to cause mental breakdowns.
Whilst some argue, “that’s because they needed to release trauma”, it should be noted that trauma should be touched gently and in small doses. As my trauma therapist says: “when it comes to trauma, less is more”. Thus, meditating for 10 hours has the potential to open up old trauma and unless there is a process for grounding and integration, it could leave one feeling incredibly detached from reality – or worse – a psychotic breakdown.
As my friend Sang Vu said: “Attending an intense meditation retreat without adequate regular practice is like running a marathon with no training.”
In the age of quick fixes, we all want to change yesterday. However, this rushing and forcing results can do a lot of damage to people, particularly by irresponsible meditation teachers. Some need to be referred to trauma therapy – not meditation retreats.
A common cop-out for some meditation teachers when things go really wrong is “keep meditating” when instead, they should perhaps be referring to professional support or psychiatry.
As a life coach, I do not hesitate to make such referrals if I feel there’s serious trauma that needs professional help that is beyond my scope or ability.
SAFER AND FASTER ALTERNATIVES
Most people want a quick-fix to their problems, and so assume that because small doses of meditation can be beneficial, they may wrongly assume that more is going to fix their life faster. Spending time in a relaxing jacuzzi can definitely be beneficial. But is it healthy to spend 10 hours in it? Probably not.
Here are some safer and easier alternatives:
Mindfulness One option for stress reduction is mindfulness. “Wait, isn’t that the same as meditation?” Well, no, not exactly. You can practice mindfulness anywhere: walking, eating, showering, etc. I personally like to practice it in the spa. I like to feel the sensation of the jacuzzi streams, the way my body relaxes in the steam room in the heat, the cool pool water. Tuning into physical sensations is a wonderful and healthy way to relax.
Prayer Another option is prayer. I have personally witnessed and experienced the power of prayer causing rapid healing for trauma. Some people in my church have even experienced miraculous healing of long-term physical problems (much to the disbelief of doctors and others).
Life Coaching As for rapid insights and growth, life coaching is another option. Depending on the modality and the skill of the practitioner, this can be incredibly powerful to discover what unconscious beliefs and behaviours might be holding you back.
You also do not have to be spiritual and it won’t take you years to master! In fact, one of my clients recently messaged me saying that after just the consultation session, saying they had felt so relieved, in a way they haven’t felt in a long time. That’s what I love about my job as a life coach! In fact, several very successful people including Oprah Winfrey, Bill Clinton, and Leonardo DiCaprio have all hired life coaches before. Of course, a limitation of life coaching is that the focus is on moving you to your full potential, rather than treating any mental health disorders (in which case, a therapist or a psychiatrist would be better).
CONCLUSION
Meditation can be a useful tool and has some benefits as well as limitations (many find it difficult) and it should be used moderately and appropriately, and not intensely. Men especially, who can have a tendency to do things in extremeness, in intensity, competitively, should be mindful not to overdo meditation or prove their worth through putting themselves through unnecessary physically or mentally painful meditation practice. Meditation is better practiced in regular but small chunks of time, such as with meditation apps like Calm, which has daily 10-minute guided sessions. Other tools such as prayer and life coaching should be explored as an additional tool or as an alternative for insight and clarity.
—
What’s Next? Talk with others. Take action.
We are proud of our SOCIAL INTEREST GROUPS—WEEKLY PHONE CALLS to discuss, gain insights, build communities— and help solve some of the most difficult challenges the world has today. Calls are for Members Only (although you can join the first call for free). Not yet a member of The Good Men Project? Join below!
RSVP for Intersectionality Calls
—
Join the Conscious Intersectionality FACEBOOK GROUP here. Includes our new call series on Human Rights.
Join The Good Men Project Community
All levels get to view The Good Men Project site AD-FREE. The $50 Platinum Level is an ALL-ACCESS PASS—join as many groups and classes as you want for the entire year. The $25 Gold Level gives you access to any ONE Social Interest Group and ONE Class–and other benefits listed below the form. Or…for $12, join as a Bronze Member and support our mission, and have a great ad-free viewing experience.
Register New Account
Please note: If you are already a writer/contributor at The Good Men Project, log in here before registering. (Request a new password if needed).
◊♦◊
ANNUAL PLATINUM membership ($50 per year) includes:
1. AN ALL ACCESS PASS — Join ANY and ALL of our weekly calls, Social Interest Groups, classes, workshops, and private Facebook groups. We have at least one group phone call or online class every day of the week.
2. See the website with no ads when logged in!
3. MEMBER commenting badge.
***
ANNUAL GOLD membership ($25 per year) includes all the benefits above — but only ONE Weekly Social Interest Group and ONE class.
***
ANNUAL BRONZE membership ($12 per year) is great if you are not ready to join the full conversation but want to support our mission anyway. You’ll still get a BRONZE commenting badge, and you can pop into any of our weekly Friday Calls with the Publisher when you have time. This is for people who believe—like we do—that this conversation about men and changing roles and goodness in the 21st century is one of the most important conversations you can have today.
♦◊♦
We have pioneered the largest worldwide conversation about what it means to be a good man in the 21st century. Your support of our work is inspiring and invaluable.
—
This post was previously published on Nick Hatter and is reprinted with permission of the author.
Photo courtesy Pixabay.