I've voting for a random third party candidate this year.... :) I've voted for 3rd party candidates most years, although not randomly. I was leaning towards Barr, but the more I ...

This looks like some random third party DLL or add-on that's crashing. ... you turn those off, does IE still crash? ... See http://zachd.com/pss/pss.html for some helpful WMP info.

random third party? (Does it, perhaps, distinguish between 135/tcp "failed to connect" and 135/tcp "connected, but target was patched and so could not be infected"?)

First, random third party hackers would rather prefer attacks on security holes of complex implementations of complex protocols. AHA! So that explains why X.509 certificates ...

You've got some random third party gunk on this system, of course. Offhand, why are madrm.dll mk_lyric.dll lgscroll.dll mlfhook.dll mawmp.dll on your system?

I'd bet you have random third party codecs on this system. What are they? Do you perhaps have an old version of nevideo.ax on this system? Where did it come from?

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am not quite sure I would allow a random third party root access to my servers. I wish to prepare. What "commands" and "config files" they will look?

In particular, it protects you from attacks from random third party hackers. Indeed. This is called end-to-end security. Cryptographically merely shifts "control".