Post-Tribune |

Lunch Buddies program in Porter County pairs adult mentors with at-risk children

As Rick Urschel read “Charlotte’s Web” with the enthusiasm of a high school drama teacher, his 8-year-old “Lunch Buddy” sprawled himself on the classroom floor.

The boy proudly wore Urschel’s dark sunglasses, looking as cool as a first grader could look at Flint Lake Elementary School in Valparaiso. Every Wednesday during the school year, Urschel has visited his little pal during lunch, recess and, occasionally, to read a storybook to his class.

Urschel, a 41-year-old married father of two daughters, first met the boy when he was in kindergarten, a year the boy needed to repeat.

The boy’s home life has been challenging to say the least. His father is out of the picture. His mother is not always in the picture. And his grandma has become the picture of Plan B parenting, doing the best she can with the boy and his siblings.

“When I first met him, I figured he would be like my 6-year-old daughter,” Urschel recalled. “He wasn’t.”

At the school playground that first day, Urschel repeatedly assured the boy that they would see each other again the following Wednesday.

“No, we won’t,” the boy replied defiantly. “Nobody comes back. They never come back.”

Urschel has been coming back for three years now through the Lunch Buddies program of Our Greater Good, a mentoring initiative for at-risk or troubled children in Porter County schools. Roughly 70 adult mentors meet once a week, for an hour or so, at children’s schools throughout the academic year.

“I’ve told my buddy that he can call me Rick or Mr. Urschel, but he always calls me mentor,” said Urschel, president and CEO of Urschel Laboratories in Valparaiso. “So he’s called me mentor for three years.”

It’s a fitting title for this program, which stemmed from a 20-year Columbia University study concluding that a single common denominator helps kids avoid such social pitfalls as teen pregnancy, dropping out of high school, and alcohol or substance abuse.

“Over 95% of the children that didn’t succumb to these risks all had one significant, consistent adult in their life,” said Garner Tullis, founder and executive director of Our Greater Good. “And that adult doesn’t need to be biologically related, as long as the relationship is from childhood through high school.”

Tullis, a former senior pastor at Bethel Church in the city, noticed years ago that thousands of Porter County families are facing substance abuse, affordable housing, and the daily challenges of being a single mother.

“There’s a much greater need in our region than people realize,” Tullis said, rattling off alarming statistics about poverty, transient families, and single-mother households.

“There are more than 1,500 single mothers in Center Township alone, a crazy high number,” he said inside his office, located in a HealthLinc building. “The four Title 1 elementary schools in Valpo have free and reduced lunch populations at over 50%, meaning each of these homes are economically stressed, if not close to poverty levels.”

In 2014, his fledgling program began in only two schools. On the very first day, one of the principals referred a troubled student to Tullis. Ever since that eye-opening day, Tullis has been hustling to find adult mentors for hundreds of children.

“As basketball legend Bill Russell once said, there’s no such thing as other people’s children,” Tullis said.

Our Greater Good has since expanded its initiatives beyond Lunch Buddies to other related programs: Boys to Men group mentoring; Girls to Women group mentoring; Love & Logic parenting classes; and Ready, Set, Kindergarten. In all, seven initiatives are now serving 31 schools.

“These programs are great for kids who have difficulty fitting in or who need extra guidance,” said Dena Dennis, whose son attends Ben Franklin Middle School.

Her son is part of the Boys to Men program, with other mentors in addition to Tullis.

“Garner is wonderful talking with the boys,” Dennis said. “My son really enjoys this program because he has social and peer issues. This group gives him a chance to meet other kids like him.”

Kyle Knutson, of Chesterton, began volunteering as a Lunch Buddy in 2015 with a 10-year-old boy at Central Elementary School in Valparaiso.

“It’s really nice being a positive role model and an influence in a young person’s life,” said Knutson, who’s married with a new baby son.

“So many times on any given day things go wrong or can put you in a negative mindset. However, when it comes time for lunch with my little lunch buddy, I need to be positive, happy and supportive. It’s a win-win for both of us,” he said.

Tullis has a waiting list of children from multiple schools in need of adult mentors. The kids, who may be emotionally wounded or socially awkward, are hand-picked by school social workers or counselors.

“My Lunch Buddy has a huge heart,” Urschel said. “If another kid falls down or gets bullied, he’s the first one to stand up for them. Also, he can’t wait to show me his good grades or his smiley-face chart.”

Nearly half of the 70 Lunch Buddies mentors are women, but Tullis is looking for more racial diversity for this program, which comes with a 35-page mentoring manual.

Potential mentors can be intimidated by the fact they may be needed for several years, but Tullis said new research shows that multiple mentors can tag-team the same child year after year.

“Trouble is, I need mentors for every program we offer, including Lunch Buddies,” he said. “Early intervention is crucial for these kids.”