26 Hilarious Tweets By Women That Helped Me Forget About My Impending Seasonal Depression
Here's what happened last week: The queue to pay respects to the dead queen was very long, Blake Lively posted her own pregnancy photos on Instagram to get back at the paparazzi, and Adam Levine maybe cheated on his pregnant wife but definitely doesn't know how to sext. And that's what you missed on GLEE!
20th Century Fox Television / Via media.giphy.com
So distract yourself from the chaos of the world with the chaos of this roundup, and make sure you follow these funny ladies on Twitter!
1.
fashion students be like damn i have pants due at 11:59pm
2.
My toddler won’t come to me in his room to get ready for bed bc he’s playing with his toys so instead I decided to lie down in my bed so he can sense I’m comfortable and come ruin it.
3.
called my friend to tell him i got fired from my day job and he responded by saying he got cast on SNL
4.
it's fun how my parents, who spent my whole life lecturing me on the value and importance of hard work, seem personally offended by the fact that I can not chat with them in the middle of the day because I have a job
5.
phantom of the opera should go out with a bang by actually dropping the chandelier on the audience during the last performance
6.
No, no. Fantasy is when you really want to fuck an elf, and sci-fi is when you really want to fuck a robot. Hope this helps.
7.
I’m hearing 70+ year old are waiting in a queue for 14+ hours to see the queen??? I am never giving up my seat on the bus ever again
8.
In my Alaskan bear era (eating a lot of salmon, sleeping increasingly more, snacking on berries n honey, snarling at strangers)
9.
I always think I'm like "with it" and then I see something like this and realize I truly have no idea what's going on, ever
10.
If evolution is real then shouldn't women be able to shoot pepper spray out of their fingertips by now?
11.
ok kids are dumb as hell once I asked a 3 year old what she wanted to be when she grew up and she hit me w "doctor or shopping cart"
12.
I just need to go ahead and admit it.I'm not mature enough to live in a state called Idaho
13.
“Is chicken the animal spelled the same as chicken the food?” - my child, about to be shook
14.
obama voice: My uh, Chemical Romance
15.
HE HATES ME!!! (he’s asleep while i’m awake)
16.
What do you think the other Maroon 4 are saying
17.
Tonight's to-do list:-honk-shoo-honk-mimimimimi
18.
You overpack for vacation and most of the stuff you don’t even wear, but your clothes need a vacation too. They seem to enjoy it.
19.
i would have a lot more faith in ghost experts if i saw them go "actually no this house isn't haunted" even once
20.
"slut era" she whispers while in a committed long term monogamous relationship and she only leaves her apartment for groceries
21.
In a way we’re ALL in a massive queue leading to a coffin
22.
Thoight I’d have a few more years before the kids’ math homework got too hard for me, but looks like I’m tapping out at grade two
23.
fucking obsessed with the titles they give these Lifetime thrillers. Hell friggin yes I want to watch "Swim Instructor Nightmare"
24.
My newest passion is making up sex positions when weird dudes ask my favorite. I'm a big fan of the Flying Lacrosse Kick, but I also really like the Tightrope Nanny.
25.
Therapist: what do we say when our actions have upset someone?Me: Hoes mad Therapist: no
26.
omg thanks for ending the meeting 4 minutes early and "giving me some time back" -- now I can finally pursue my passions
