Arrowhead students must have parental permission to use different names and pronouns at school, new policy says
Alec Johnson
The Arrowhead School Board on Sept. 14 approved a policy requiring parental permission for students' names, nicknames and pronouns to be changed for use while at school.
Board members approved the policy, 8-1, at the board's regular meeting. Board member Craig Thompson cast the lone no vote.
"I get to a more practical point in saying simply that we have an imperfect but a good practice here and to open up ourselves, I believe, to almost saying 'Here we are. You can pick on us for a lawsuit' — I don't see why we would want to do that," Thompson said.
Board member Chris Farris, who introduced the policy in August, said parents of minor children have the right to know what's going on with their kids at school. He said the policy is similar to what the district already does in practice.
"I find it interesting that, as a dad, that I'm alerted to my kids' grades. I'm alerted if they're marked absent. I'm alerted if they're going on a field trip. I have to sign up on all that stuff. That's pretty minor stuff. If it's something big, I want to know about it, and parents have the right to know. That's all we're asking," Farris said.
The vote came after members of the public spoke for about an hour and 20 minutes during the meeting's public comment session, most focusing on the name and pronoun policy. The meeting in total ran almost four hours.
Resident and parent Abby Horn supported the policy.
"People here are assuming that parents are the bad guys. This is not an exclusionary tactic. This is an inclusive one. We want to be included as far as the discussions that have happened at school. We don't want to be excluded. It is our right to know what's going on because we have a duty to our children, to support them, to be there for them, to help them. If we don't know what's going on, that's impossible for us to do," Horn said.
Resident and parent Tiffany Hawley echoed those remarks.
"I understand that there are parents that are not going to be supportive or loving in a situation like this, but you can't just assume that that's the majority because I don't think that is the majority. The parent has to be involved when the child is a minor, no matter what," Hawley said.
The policy was also supported by the Facebook page "Lake Country Republicans," which posted Aug. 28 encouraging its supporters to attend the Sept. 14 meeting.
Others spoke against the policy.
Ray Wieland, a student at Arrowhead who uses the pronouns they/them, read from accounts of two friends, who identify as LGBTQ and nonbinary, respectively, in which the friends' parents had threatened the friends' personal safety.
"This policy you are trying to enact will put the lives of these children, your students, in danger. If a teenager hasn't told their parents they're trans or that they use different pronouns or a different name, they most likely have a reason, whether it's for their mental health or physical health or even their personal safety. They still have a right to keep that information away from their parents if they do not feel safe. This policy would force teens to choose between being themselves and their safety," said Wieland.
Resident and parent Stephanie Kosidowski also opposed the policy. She said that if students are not talking to their parents, or feel that they can't tell their parents, that's on parents and not the school.
"Adopting this policy risks putting a student already in a vulnerable state at potential further risk. And isn't the job of the school board to work for all of the students? Why are you trying to make a policy that elevates anyone — in this case parents — over the student? Again, if my child cannot come to me and feel safe, that's something for me to work on, not for the school board to legislate. I would much rather have the school on the side of my child than on mine," Kosidowski said.
Policy details
The policy, which was selected from two attorney recommendations, says for nicknames, name changes and pronoun usage requests that don't involve changing a student's official records, parents have the right to determine what names and pronouns staff use to refer to their children while at school. Staff cannot refer to or address minor students by a different name or pronoun different from their biological sex during school hours without a parent's written permission.
Under the policy, written permission should be filled out by the parent or guardian at the time of student registration and can be changed at any time. A legal name change is required to make changes to legal documents such as transcripts, Advanced Placement and ACT/SAT registrations.
Contact Alec Johnson at (262) 875-9469 or alec.johnson@jrn.com. Follow him on Twitter at @AlecJohnson12.