Rachel Brougham: So we’re upset over chocolate ‘wokeness?’

I never thought in a million years I’d be writing a column about the footwear choices of anthropomorphic candies and how that’s causing outrage. But then again, it’s 2023 and really, is there anything that surprises us these days?

If you don’t follow the weird fixations of some in the political world, let me get you up to speed. Last week, some on the far-right of the political spectrum pointed their fingers at Mars Inc., saying M&M’s marketing leaned left. Some went on tirades about how Ms. Green M&M had traded her high heels for sneakers. Some were upset over the plus-size of another M&M. It’s polarizing, some cried. It was an uproar over fictional candy personalities going — as some like to call it — “woke.”

I know, gasp.

Even Republicans on the House Judiciary Committee — the committee that oversees matters relating to the administration of justice in federal courts, administrative bodies and law enforcement agencies — tweeted out from its official account, blaming the left for the M&M’s newfound “wokeness.” Evidently the House Judiciary Committee now also oversees whining about marketing campaign ideologies.

Last I checked, the idea of being “woke” is being aware of issues such as racism and inequality. I’m not sure how that’s a bad thing, but like I said earlier, it’s 2023 so I’m not surprised by much.

All that whining prompted M&M’s to respond to this clear nonsense, saying the “beloved spokescandies” will be on an indefinite pause. In their place, Saturday Night Live alum Maya Rudolph will take over as spokesperson.

I admit, I don’t work in government and I don’t work on candy marketing campaigns. But I am a voter and I have to ask, Is this really what the American people want their elected leaders focused on?

I’m pretty sure that back in November, we all went to the polls and voted for people who would best represent our values, and get the things we want done, done. Issues like the economy, crime, border protection, gun laws and abortion rights brought us to the polls. I didn’t have “complain about a candy’s political ideology” on my list, and I bet you didn’t either.

I realize this all seems like a joke and I’m mocking a group of elected officials and political pundits on one side of the aisle for focusing their attention on a candy marketing campaign. Except that’s exactly what happened and I believe it’s all a sign of a much larger problem.

Shouldn’t those making choices for our country at least act like they’re being serious? Do those in Congressional leadership really have nothing other to work on besides going after a bag of chocolate “spokescandies?” Talk about manufactured outrage.

By the time this column actually goes to print, perhaps these lawmakers will have focused their outrage someplace else. Perhaps they’ll tackle inflation or mass shootings. Or will they get upset over Potato Head dolls going all-inclusive? Oh wait, that already happened two years ago.

— Rachel Brougham is the former assistant editor of the Petoskey News-Review. You can email her at racheldbrougham@gmail.com.

This article originally appeared on The Petoskey News-Review: Rachel Brougham: So we’re upset over chocolate ‘wokeness?’