Opinion: Give CovCath students room to process without harassment
The video of the confrontation between the Native American elder and the Covington Catholic student sporting a MAGA hat has devolved into a fight over who started it and what the intentions were. No one is surprised. This is who we are now as a society. We clip videos to suit our propaganda, we spin news to protect our assumptions, and we fight online before we have all of the information.
And while adults hash things out on social media, I’m thinking about those kids. I’m not blaming them and I’m not exonerating them either. I’m thinking about the process, not the accountability. I’m thinking that as parents we need to do better. We need to stop posturing and protecting and fighting online.
And what I hope the adults surrounding the boys from Covington Catholic are doing is sitting down with them to listen. Not to get their side of the story per se, but listening to the coping mechanisms being used as they deal with the fact that they are in the center of 15-minutes of negative fame.
These kids are being labeled or defended by individuals reading click bait headlines and interpreting events based on their own unpacked baggage. Meanwhile, these kids have to cope. Will this experience make them stronger and help them cultivate kindness and empathy? Or will it make them angry? Viral videos are what many suicides and acts of violence are made of. Public judgment can be the overwhelming tipping point in a vulnerable adolescent moment.
Every kid deserves a listening ear and conscientious conversation when they are under attack – regardless of fault. We cannot let every public disagreement spiral downward into divisive contempt. We have to strive for communication and empathy if we are to rise above the toxic nature of most internet comments sections.
Maybe for many liberals, it’s tough to look at a white male in a MAGA hat and not attach some conjecture. Our president has done enough name-calling and taunting to make it absolutely believable that this young white male in a MAGA hat on a school-sponsored trip to a political rally would behave in the same vein. I’m not even trying to argue if that’s the case or not. For many conservatives it might be easy to see the breakdown of a system that would permit such hate towards a hat that shows affection for a president whose message is to "make America great again." Who’s helping kids understand all of this? What I care about most is that the adults in these kids’ lives help them understand that assumptions are made based on that MAGA merch and CovCath sweatshirt. Just like assumptions are made around a band t-shirt, hijab or crucifix.
These high school boys are at a point of development where they can reflect more deeply on their actions and beliefs. They are experimenting with their identities. We see it in their clothing, language, entertainment and actions. Lessons aren’t always attached to blame. Kids need space to work things out. These boys from Covington Catholic need guidance so that this now very public experience becomes a teaching moment, an evolutionary moment and not necessarily a defining moment.
Bonnie Jean Feldkamp is a Highlands High School graduate, wife and mother of three, freelance writer and communications director of the National Society of Newspaper Columnists. Email: Writerbonnie@gmail.com Find her on Twitter and Instagram: @writerbonnie
