Pocket Money Pitch
5.30pm, CBBC
Young entrepreneurs are invited into a mini Dragons’ Den in this new series for inventive eight- to 14-year-olds. The little clever clogs must pitch to a business guru for the chance to win a year’s pocket money, which is worth over £300. This week, Levi Roots is the man to impress and the kids’ ideas are genius, from Sunday lunch on a pizza and a pimped-up scotch egg to spreadable fudge and cool cookies. Although Roots is lovely with them, he’s tough too, firing questions about profit and loss to throw them off. Hannah Verdier
Royal Navy Sailor School
9pm, Channel 4
“It’s not the biggest navy in the world,” as HMS Raleigh’s aptly named master-at-arms Ian Gritt tells the new recruits, “but it’s the best.” In this candid new “barnacle-on-the-wall” series we meet school leavers, mid-career-changers and wannabe pirates; and their instructors, intent on turning the “potatoes into packets of crisps” over 10 weeks. For some, homesickness and medical issues await. For others: a discharge. As one PT instructor shrieks, in a surely well-honed line: “This is the Royal Navy, not the Royal Mail!” Ali Catterall
Rick Stein’sTaste Of Shanghai
9pm, BBC2
Stein’s introduction notes that Shanghai has a distinctive flavour in many respects – a legendarily raffish and rumbustious port which was, for years, open to the world in a way that much of China wasn’t. However, Shanghai’s relatively recent emergence as a global financial hub has transformed its cuisine still further, as western restaurateurs follow the money, but here Stein is searching for old-school, authentic Shanghai cuisine, visiting restaurants, seafood markets and a rice winery. Andrew Mueller
The X-Files
9pm, Channel 5
“Do you miss it? The X-Files?” The question is put to Dana Scully, retired from the FBI and now a surgeon, but it may as well be directed to the audience, nervously awaiting the return of the 1990s phenomenon. Judging by the first episode of this six-part mini-series, it’s very much a resumption, right down to the gauzy credits and synthesizer score. Gillian Anderson and David Duchovny also slot right back into their signature roles, reuniting to investigate an inevitably Roswell-related mystery. Graeme Virtue
Addicted To Sheep
9pm, BBC4
A year in the lives of Pennine sheep farmers Tom and Kay Hutchinson and their three children. Filmmaker Magali Pettier quietly observes the hard slog and stunning views as they try to breed the perfect sheep. Whether swathed in snow in winter, or bursting with verdant colour come spring, the hills are glorious. And the kids are particularly brilliant, explaining their rural lifestyle as they attend a school entirely populated by farming children. Another charming film from the national treasure that is BBC4. Julia Raeside
Insert Name Here
10pm, BBC2
Final episode for now of the slight but amiable panel show that eschews interrogation in favour of Sue Perkins lobbing underarm softball topics at the panellists. One might argue the licence fee-paying public would gain better value by just sending the panel down to Bella Pasta and screening their subsequent pre-doughballs banter. Nominative know-it-alls joining Josh Widdicombe and Richard Osman tonight include Bake Off invigilator Paul Hollywood, historian Kate Williams and comedians Joe Lycett and Sara Pascoe. Mark Gibbings-Jones
Inside Amy Schumer
11pm, Comedy Central
More provocative sketch comedy from the winningly abrasive Schumer. The unfiltered star adopts some garish tutus and supremely creepy babytalk to enter the Little Miss Hot As Balls kiddie beauty pageant, passing off her obvious maturity as “reverse Benjamin Button syndrome”. Everything else is as gleefully sharp, from a conclave of competitive pet owners to a ladies-of-leisure meet-up that combines psychopathy with baking. GV
FILM CHOICE
The Bourne Identity (Doug Liman, 2002) 9pm, ITV2
In the first of the slick, brilliant series, Matt Damon’s soggy hero is fished out of the Med with no memory, and follows a hi-tech trail to discover his identity: a former CIA assassin. With bystander Marie (a sweetly convincing Franka Potente) in tow, he tries to get to his former bosses before they get him.
The Principles Of Lust (Penny Woolcock, 2003) 11.35pm, Film4
Writer-director Woolcock’s debut has jobless would-be-writer Alec Newman arriving at one of those forks in the road of life: does he go this way, settling down with lovely working mum Sienna Guillory? Or that way, with Marc Warren, and a life of gambling, drugs, backstreet bareknuckle fights and sex orgies? Billed as a British Fight Club, it’s intriguing, but unsatisfying.
*Today’s best live sport
ATP Tennis: The Rotterdam Open Coverage of the opening day of the tournament from the Netherlands. 10am, Sky Sports 3
Premier League Football: Southampton v West Ham United Mid-table action from St Mary’s stadium. 7pm, Sky Sports 1
NBA Basketball: Detroit Pistons v Toronto Raptors From Palace of Auburn Hills. 12.30am, BT Sport 1
One Day Cricket: Under-19 World Cup The first semi final from Mirpur. 2.30am, Sky Sports 2
Comments (…)
Sign in or create your Guardian account to join the discussion