Social media has a far-reaching impact. It has changed the way that people vacation. It’s altered how we look for new jobs. Over the past few years, it’s even become clear that wedding planning has changed as well. There are striking differences between the ideal wedding today and the ideal wedding in the pre-social media era. As anyone might expect, the cost of weddings has also been affected.
The rising cost of weddings
The cost of the average wedding has gone up consistently over the past five years. As of now, it is more than 32K, according to The Knot. It’s not difficult to see the role social media has in this. Before social media, planning a wedding was something that was done on weekends or after work. Couples would peruse magazines, visit places to be fit for tuxedos and gowns, go to caterers for samplings, check out potential venues and plan their reception when they weren’t busy doing other things. When they were busy with other things, wedding planning waited.
Wedding planning no longer waits. Now it’s done over the phone. Brides and grooms can keep browser tabs open to Instagram and Pinterest pages full of wedding ideas. Wedding planners are accessible through messaging apps. All of this makes it so much easier to add just one more element to the wedding or reception to make it ‘perfect’.
There’s also the competition. People aren’t just planning perfect weddings. They’re planning for all of these instagrammable moments within their weddings. That thought process even continues into planning the honeymoon. Sixty-two percent of couples say they spend more time on social media after they get engaged. To some extent, competitiveness is a driving factor behind this. After all, they can’t put on an enviable wedding if they can’t access the latest information from brands and other couples.
Social media and an unhealthy push for perfection
Social media leaves us feeling pressured to show only the best of our lives. This pursuit of perfection is even having an impact on our mental well-being. We put only our best out there when it comes to relationships, careers, vacations, weddings and honeymoons. Because brides and grooms aren’t seeing the mistakes and frustrations of others, they have an unrealistic ideal to look up to.
Once the ring goes on, the pressure is on to find the perfect looking cake, to book the perfect place for the reception, and coordinate the biggest blowout of a reception. Couples even struggle to find the perfect wedding hashtag as a way to brand their own nuptials. There’s even DIY pressure from sites like Pinterest where pages curate the perfect decorations, flower arrangements and spreads. Even Snapchat has geofilters just for weddings.
Between the constant exposure and pressure, the stress of it all can be very real and can have negative impacts on the couple. Even those in their periphery can be impacted. Imagine being a matron of honor or best man for a bride or groom who is determined that every element must be perfect and photogenic. When things go wrong, everything can really come crashing down.
The benefits of social media in wedding planning
It wouldn’t be fair to focus on the negative impact of social media when it comes to weddings, without acknowledging the positives. Here are a few of them to add some balance.
1. Couples can share the experience with more people
Because Facebook and other platforms allow us to create connections with friends and family members that may not be sustainable elsewhere, people can share the news of their engagement, form private social media groups just for wedding attendees and keep people they care about in the loop. Even those who might be unable to attend for financial and geographical reasons can see pictures, even enjoy live video feeds of the event.
2. Couples have more access to ideas and options
If they can remain immune to pressure to put on the perfect wedding, all of the great wedding ideas on social media can be really helpful. Couples on a budget, or just those who want to do something a little different can put together pin boards with cool wedding decorations, cool and thrifty bridal party presents, party ideas and a stunning engagement ring. They can also use social media to reach out to others for ideas.
3. Social media can make destination wedding planning easier
Until recently, planning a destination wedding meant taking an extra trip, or spending a lot of time on the phone. In either case, it was difficult to be sure that things would go off as planned. Now, thanks to Skype and other technologies, engaged couples can speak in person to anyone involved in the planning from the hotel concierge to the officiant. It’s even possible to take virtual tours of some venues.
Thanks to social media, the pressure to put on the perfect wedding is real. That’s not a great thing. On the other hand, social media can make planning more convenient, it can bring people together and it’s full of great ideas. The key is keeping things in perspective and using social media as an idea generation tool rather than a means of creating unrealistic expectations.
